Becky's Book Review 2017

It is what you read when you don't have to 

that determines what you will be when you can't help it.

-Oscar Wilde

This year was an incredible year of growth for me, and a large part of that was because of the books I read and listened to. There are countless others that I started and did not finish since they did not grip me in that moment. Those, I may return to this year. In looking back at all I have learned during the past year,  it makes me excited to think what lies ahead for my heart, mind and soul in 2018!

Here is a list of most of the books I read and my top 10 summarized!

1. Ego is the Enemy, Ryan Holiday

 "Ego holds us back from living the life it makes us desire so much, what we can do to overcome it at every turn and how to achieve true greatness."

2. Success Principles, Jack Canfield 

"Teaches you how to increase your confidence, tackle daily challenges, live with passion and purpose, and realize all your ambitions."

3. Gifts of Imperfection, Brene Brown 

"When you choose to be vulnerable with your shame and imperfection, you allow yourself to experience courage, compassion, and connection." I would recommend ALL of Brene's Books!!

4. Entrusted, Beth Moore 

"God has entrusted us with unique gifts and the incredible Gospel message, neither of which we should keep to ourselves."

5. Crazy Busy, Kevin Deyoung 

"Busyness can ruin our joy, it can rob our hearts, and it can cover up the rot in our souls. How to recognize our busyness and find a better, more satisfying, and more sustainable way to get through life." 

6. Sell or Be Sold, Grant Cardone

 "Everyone is selling something and massive results takes massive action."

7. Ted Talks, Chris Anderson 

"Explains the importance of public speaking and the joy it brings to both the speaker and the audience and offers  ways to plan and deliver a talk that will make a lasting impact."

8. Search Inside Yourself, Chade-Meng Tan 

"Search Inside Yourself is a program for developing emotional intelligence created by an early engineer at Google and now offered as a live course; this book attempts to make the program accessible to everyone."

9. Perfectly Imperfect, The Art of soul of Yoga, Baron Baptiste 

"Go beyond the foundations of the Yoga practice by to where the true transformation occurs, and that often happens after you leave the mat."

10. Perennial Seller, Ryan Holiday 

"Explains the effort needed to create a timeless work and then shows you how to correctly position and market it."

Here is a list of the majority of the books I read this year:

Spirituality and Faith:

Resolution for Women, Patricia Shirer

Gideon, Patricia Shirer

She Did What She Could, Elisa Morgan

Every Woman’s Battle, Shannon Ethridge

Stronger, Angela Thomas

Entrusted, Beth Moore

Sermon on the Mount, Jen Wilkin

Woman at the Well, Shannon Ethridge

Circlemaker, Mark Batterson

Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, Depak Chopra

Personal Growth:

Ego is the Enemy, Ryan Holiday

Emotional Intelligence, Bradberry & Greaves

I thought it was Just Me, Brene Brown

Daring Greatly, Brene Brown

Power of Vulnerability, Brene Brown

Gifts of Imperfection, Brene Brown

Perfectly Imperfect, The Art of soul of Yoga, Baron Baptiste

Search Inside Yourself, Chade-Meng Tan

Relationship:

10 great Dates to Energize your Marriage, David and Claudia Arp

Mating in Captivity, Esther Perel

5 Minute Relationship, Campbell and Gray

Ultimate Relationship Program, Tony Robbins

How to Create Chemistry with Anyone, Leil Lowndes

Crazy Busy, Kevin DeYoung

Business:

Success Principles, Jack Canfield

Sell or Be Sold, Grant Cardone

Barefoot Executive, Carrie Wilkerson

Secrets of Closing, Zig Ziglar

Closer’s Survival Guide, Grant Cardone

Rock Your Network Marketing Business, Sarah Robbins

TED TALKS, Chris Anderson

Power of Moments, Chip & Dan Heath

Perennial Seller, Ryan Holiday

Fun:

Magnolia, Chip and Joanna Gaines

Fitness:

Bigger Leaner Stronger, Michael Matthews

Thinner Leaner Stronger, Michael Matthews

You are Growing

Last year was an amazing year of growth for me personally, and I plan on continuing the growth into 2018 and beyond. Not because I am not enough, but because I AM beautifully enough!! A big part of resting into place of enough is self-awareness and self-love. It is knowing oneself-- the areas you are proud of and the areas the can use some work, and committing to continual growth. Not because there is anything wrong with you, but because you love yourself enough to be investing in you-- to be taking time to grow!! 

Jack Canfield, author of the "Chicken Soup for the Soul" series and "The Success Principles" emphasizes the idea of never-ending constant improvement. "In Japan, the word for constant and never-ending improvement is kaizen. Not only is this an operating philosophy for modern Japanese businesses, it is also the age-old philosophy of warriors, too—and it’s becoming the personal mantra of millions of successful people. Achievers—whether in business, sports or the arts—are committed to continual improvement. If you want to be more successful, you need to learn to ask yourself, “How can I make this better? How can I do it more efficiently? How can I do this more profitably? How can we do this with greater love?” 

I applied growth to my fitness goals for years. I knew that at a certain age women are constantly losing small amounts of muscle, so working out was not only to get stronger but to maintain my current strength. This also applies to our mental and emotional health-- we need to be feeding our minds and growing our spirits or slowly, and ever so slightly, we lose that sharpness or we stagnate.  Tony Robbins says, "If you are not growing, you are dying." And maybe death is a strong word, but you can also rephrase it, " When you are growing, you are living."Will you commit to growth this year? This week? This day? Will you live?

Dear Holiday Moms,

Dear Holiday Moms,

Whether you are a new mom, mom-to-be, seasoned mom, or fur mom, there is probably a very slim chance that you will be thanked for the countless holidays tasks you will complete over the next few weeks, so let me take a moment to tell all of you... THANK YOU!

THANK YOU for coordinating the cutest holiday family photo outfits, creating the perfect card, gathering addresses, licking all the envelopes and then trekking to the post office to spend a small fortune to share your family smiles with those you love!

THANK YOU for remembering to water the tree, move the elf, plug in the tree, turn on the lights, unplug the tree, turn off the lights, send in the class party treats, bake the casseroles for the potluck, buy the white elephant gifts, and keep the house stocked with scotch tape, hot cocoa, and wine.

THANK YOU for decorating, un-decorating, wrapping, unwrapping, shopping, returning, cleaning, re-cleaning,  meal planning, preparing, and hosting with a smile.

THANK YOU for buying the cookie supplies, taking time to bake them with little helpers, having fun decorating them, cleaning up after the sprinkle storm, and then resisting eating them for the next week.

THANK YOU for dressing the kids to play in the snow, making the hot cocoa and snacks for when they return, and then handling the mountain of wet cold clothing afterwards, just to do it again in an hour.

THANK YOU for spoiling all those around you with thoughtful gifts-- spouse, kids, extended family, neighbors, teachers, co-workers, service providers and even pets, while keeping it all in budget (or trying to).

THANK YOU for waiting way too long in line to see Santa, for braving the cold to watch the parade, and for playing paparazzi at every holiday performance.

THANK YOU for keeping the true meaning of Christmas alive while embracing the fun and magic of new traditions.

THANK YOU for donating your time and resources to the charities in you life too-- for the cash squeezed in the red tin, the toys for tots gathered, the shoeboxes filled and prayed over, the coats collected for the shelter, and the non-perishables given in the food drive.

You GIVE with your heart, for no recognition, for no reward and for no THANK YOU expected.

Your little ones (and big ones) make not say THANK YOU enough, but the smiles on their faces, and the stories they will share for years to come will serve as reminders that you are doing amazing at creating the magic of holiday memories.

THANK YOU, MOM!

You are Resilient

Photo : https://expertvagabond.com/elephants-in-thailand/

Some of my parent struggles include raising amazing children without the capacity to flush the toilet, put dirty clothes in the hamper, or chew with their mouths closed. I have learned to deal with over the years, and just hope that one day they will grow out of it. But, my peak parenting fail was when for weeks, I convinced my middle daughter that her itchy head was just dandruff, and then discovered the most resilience creatures on this planet—lice had really been the culprit. Talk about mom guilt, parent fail, shame web all wrapped into one tiny little bug!!

We went into attack mode washing, brushing, cleaning, combing, disinfecting, and laundering every inch of our home and hair. And let me tell you, these buggers are resilient! They are tough, adaptable, and don’t go down without a fight!!

Resilience Defined:

1.    the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness.

2.    the ability of a substance or object to spring back into shape; elasticity.

When I think of resilience, I think of those extraordinary people who have endured great struggle and overcome—first responders, illness survivors, recovering addicts, etc. But the truth is we are all resilient, it is an ordinary aspect of life, not reserved for the super strong or super human.

Just like the lice, we are tough, adaptable and don’t go down without a fight! But sometimes there is an element of failure, guilt or shame that accompanies our struggles. And sometimes that leads us to mask our emotions and needs. Here is what I wish I had known earlier in life and hope to share with you:

It is not weakness to need others or to ask for help.

It is not weakness to share your real emotions, even when they are messy.

It is not weakness to not have it all figured out or have no idea what to do next.

It is not weakness to need time to heal and recover.

It is not weakness to struggle… it is human!

This is where resilience begins… just like a ball, to bounce back, you sometimes must hit the ground, hard-- figuratively or literally. And if you need help bouncing, share your struggle with those who have earned to right to hear it. Not a mass facebook post, but a spouse or trusted friend who loves you no matter what. Once I began my journey to emotional wholeness, I shared my struggles with a few life-long friends who loved me through some very hard and dark parts of my life.

It wasn’t until a few months later, I heard the most wonderful analogy. When an elephant is injured, fellow elephants will stand closely next to it to hold it up while it heals, because it if falls, it will be unable to get back up again. Do you have those people in your life that will stand with you and hold you up while you heal? Are you that support for someone else? It may be time to act like lice and find your elephants!